


Recovery

by sekaiseifuku



Series: Happy Robots in Love [2]
Category: DRAMAtical Murder - All Media Types
Genre: AllMates, Clear's Good End, Future Fic, M/M, RenAo Week, body switching, references to severe injury
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-22
Updated: 2015-04-22
Packaged: 2018-03-23 09:54:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,909
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3763753
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sekaiseifuku/pseuds/sekaiseifuku
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>recovery<br/>noun re·cov·ery \ri-ˈkə-və-rē, -ˈkəv-rē\ </p><p>1. return to a normal state of health, mind, or strength:<br/>2. The action or process of regaining possession or control of something stolen or lost:</p>
            </blockquote>





	Recovery

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be a contribution to [RenAo Week](http://renaoweek.tumblr.com), Day 1: Recovery; however, it is super, super late.  
> Takes place prior to [Greetings](http://archiveofourown.org/works/2743754), but should be read after it. If you've not read Greetings, this probably won't make a whole lot of sense.

If Aoba had the ability to describe what he was experiencing -- which he did not -- he would most certainly not describe it as fading in and out of consciousness. He’d been there and done that and this was nothing like that had been. Nothing at all. This was almost as if he were flickering in and out of existence, faintly existing one moment and then completely gone the next. 

Sometimes, though, he heard a voice calling his name in the far distance, its soft tones sharpened by a sad, plaintive edge. 

Other times, he heard different voices, these so close they might almost be coming from inside him. And as the periods of time during which remained aware grew shorter and shorter, those particular voices grew louder and louder.

“Aoba…”

" _Listen, idiot._ "

“Aoba ... please ...

And for the first time in what seemed like ages, Aoba _felt_ something.

“… you have to wake up now ...” 

The voice was firm, but its familiarity sent a soft tendril of warmth through Aoba’s body. It roused something insistent and desperate inside him that began to claw its way to the surface. 

“Aoba, open your damned eyes.” A different voice, but equally familiar. “Please…” 

He registered the touch of a hand on his cheek and the feel of its searing heat against his skin made him realize he was chilled to the bone and had been for as long as he could remember. Opening his leaden eyelids took more effort than it should have, but when he did, a familiar, yet unexpected face filled his vision, framed by a deep yellow halo of light. 

“Ren?” he choked out. 

He couldn’t remember the last time he’d seen Ren’s online form. But there it was, staring down at him with an expression that Aoba couldn't name. 

“Welcome back,” he said, the look on his face morphing into a faint smile as he helped Aoba to sit up. 

A wave of nostalgia washed over Aoba, familiar and warm. But as he looked around, he realized that what he was feeling was at complete odds with what he was _seeing_. If Ren was in his online form, they had to be in Rhyme … but they hadn't so much set foot in Rhyme for years and years. And besides, wherever they were was like no Rhyme field he had ever seen. Before them stretched a wide expanse of water, reflecting the deep orange rays of the setting sun and he could feel the gentle breeze against his face, filled with the sharp, saline smell of the ocean. This, too, was tinged with that strange, long-forgotten sense of nostalgia. 

“Is this … Rhyme?” he asked, his voice rough. 

“Rhyme?” Someone laughed behind them. “If only ...” 

He turned to see … himself … standing behind them. The other him raised a hand and waved--- 

“Yo … long time no see.”

No matter how hard Aoba tried, nothing was making any sense. They weren’t in Rhyme, but Ren was next to him, solid and human, and there ... not even a meter away ... was himself. The entire situation was so bizarre that Aoba simply couldn’t process it. 

“I don’t understand," he finally said.

“Of course you don’t.” The other him sighed as he shook his head. “All this time and you never have.” 

“Aoba …” Ren interrupted, “I am sorry, but we have to leave.”

“Leave? I don't even know where we are.” Aoba felt detached, like he was thinking at half-speed.

“You,” the other him said, voice laced with annoyance. “We’re inside you.” He held up his hands, gesturing at the landscape around them. “All this ... me … even Ren there … we’re you.” His face hardened. “All this is _you_.”

“Please, Aoba.” Ren tightened his grip on Aoba’s shoulders. “Your injuries are very severe.”

“Injuries?” Aoba looked down at his body. “What do you mean?”

“He means we’re dying, you idiot.” 

“Dying?” Aoba felt like he was on some kind of endless loop, simply repeating what was being said to him … but nothing was making any _sense_.

“You can't tell me you've forgotten that little bang to the head we took ...” his other said in exasperation.

_The screeching of car brakes and smell of burning rubber. The shocking feeling of weightlessness before his body fell to the ground, head exploding with pain._

__“Oh my god.”_ _

__Aoba raised his hand to the side of his head, expecting to encounter the wetness of blood against his fingertips. He brought his hand away, but it was completely dry, like nothing had happened. But just the recall of that brief instant brought a sense of ongoing pain to the front of his mind, as if it had been pushed far away into a corner and forgotten until just this moment._ _

__“… that happened, didn’t it …” he said, mostly to himself._ _

__“Yes.” Ren’s brow creased as he took one of Aoba’s hands and pulled him to his feet. “And your condition is worsening.”_ _

__“ _Our_ condition,” the other him said, his voice now taking on the slightest hint of distress._ _

__“Aoba,” Ren continued, “I am sorry that I can’t explain everything right now, but I have to ask you to trust me. We must leave before it’s too late.”_ _

__"Leave?" Aoba looked out at the sun sinking on the horizon, the clouds above it a riot of purples and pinks. He thought perhaps he had never seen a sunset quite so beautiful. Why would he want to leave?_ _

__“Listen!” His other’s voice called his attention away from their surroundings. “This body is failing. _Quickly failing_. And when it goes, we all go. I don’t know about you, but I’m not sure as hell not ready to give up.” _ _

__“Aoba, you have to trust us,” Ren implored. “We do not have die… but in order to live, you will have to leave this body behind.”_ _

__"Leave my body?! How could that even be possible?” Aoba didn't know what kind of fever dream he was in, but what Ren was suggesting seemed the height of insanity._ _

__"Look, I know you've forgotten." The other him was suddenly immediately beside Ren, taking Aoba's other hand and clenching it between his own. “But Puppy here is our ticket out of here. He’s done this before.”_ _

__As the sun disappeared, there was a sudden shift in the landscape, a faint greying around the edges of Aoba's vision. He felt his knees buckle and he pitched forward._ _

__"Shit," his other gasped._ _

__Aoba felt his face collide with Ren's bare chest. His instinct was to raise his hands, to grasp onto Ren's arms, but he found himself completely unable to move, the leaden feeling from earlier rising from the ground and snaring him, pulling him irrevocably downward. He could feel his other's arms around him, propping him up against Ren._ _

__"Aoba, please ... trust me." Ren pleaded. "Trust us."_ _

__"We have to go," his other breathed into his ear. " _Now._ "_ _

__And as the darkness closed in around him, Aoba managed to find enough strength to breathe out his agreement---_ _

___Yes_ _ _

__He felt a rush of motion, like he was being sucked into a vacuum. There was a split second of disorientation as his field of vision cleared and Aoba had just enough time to process the feel of something terribly different about his body before the world around him cut out, like a switch had been suddenly thrown._ _

__

____

______________________________________________________________________________

If Aoba had the ability to describe what he was experiencing -- which he did not -- he would most certainly not say that he was awake. He was certainly aware, but it was if all his senses had been cut off. He had no sense of vision, touch, smell, or taste. There were no audible sounds. The only thing he could sense was the soft presence of dual consciousnesses alongside his own.

Ren.  
_Restraint_

His other self.  
_Desire_

But that, too, wouldn't be an accurate way of describing the state of being the three of them had achieved. It wasn’t that they were alongside each other as much as they _were_ each other. There, wrapped in the familiar feel of the two presences he couldn't believe he could have forgotten, Aoba floated in a blissful state of limbo for what seemed a very, very long time. He could not speak, but wherever it was they were, there was no need. Their thoughts and impressions bled together so seamlessly that none of them knew who was thinking or feeling what.

_safe_

_I'm sorry._

_thank god_

_...see me_

_never stopped..._

_he'll know what to do._

_... didn't mean to forget ..._

_sorry..._

_missed you_

_...can't believe I forgot_

_missed this_

_I miss him_

_... always loved you_

 

Aoba didn't know how long they existed like that, joined together in their strange communion. He felt like he might be content remaining that way forever, until something began to change within them. It happened gradually, small pieces at a time, but it wasn't long before he realized the part of them that was Restraint … _Ren_ … was becoming distinct somehow. Piece by piece, he was coming together not as a part of them, but as something entirely separate. 

Again.

Aoba tried to reach out to him, to take him back into themself, but he was being pulled away too quickly. 

_Wait!_

_**This is not my doing … I'm being pulled out.** _

_\--do they understand?--_

_**I believe so … I am being …. separated** _

_No!_

_**I am sorry, but it is necessary.** _

_You can't go!!_

_\--he has to--_

_Wait!_

_\--trust us--_

_**I love you.** _

_Ren!!_

And then he was gone, disappearing completely in an instant. 

Aoba held tightly to the impression his last thought left in their mind, holding on to it as if it could somehow fill the aching wound that had been left behind. They'd lived apart for such a long time, their connection broken and forgotten, that having him taken away after being reunited so recently ...

_It's too cruel._

The presence of his other somehow wrapped around him, both gentle and strong.

_\--I won't leave you_

I never have--

It was true. He had been there the entire time, forgotten. And while Aoba forgetting Ren may have been accidental, forgetting his other self had been completely intentional. Here, where the barriers between them seemed not to exist, Aoba could feel the pain that had caused him.

_... I'm so sorry_

_\--I know--_

There was a long period of nothing before he added,

_\--don't do it again--_

And with that, they settled back into each other, thoughts once more bleeding into each other until the lines between the two were so blurred it was impossible to know where one began and the other ended. 

There was no true sense of time where they were, but the time that passed felt much longer than it had when they'd been whole. The loss of that part of themselves remained a deep, steady pain that existed within them, but it was dampened somehow by his other's absolute conviction that they would see him again. And there was not a single time that belief faltered.

Aoba thought perhaps he was the one who had been weakest, all this time.

______________________________________________________________________________

"Oi," a familar voice drawled, abruptly cutting through the silence and rousing Aoba to keen state of awareness. "You in there?"

Aoba tried to call out, to reach out, to do something ... anything ... but he was incapable of anything but existing. Except now ... it seemed he was also capable of listening. Because that had most certainly been a voice and he had most certainly _heard_ it.

 _Yes!!_

"Ooh yeah, you see that?" Aoba heard a rustling that he couldn't quite identify. "Right there … see that spike? He's responding. Not in any way I can figure out, but that’s definitely a response."

"Thank goodness," another voice, low and deep and laced with concern. 

A thrilling flash of recognition pierced Aoba to the core.

_Ren!!_

"Yeah, look, there's another one. Different this time, but still … that’s a response," the other voice said before chuckling. "Damn, I really do deserve an award for this shit."

"Noiz..." Ren's voice trailed off. He gave something that sounded suspiciously like a sniff.

 _Ren's okay!! And Noiz is here!_  
Aoba directed this toward the familiar presence at the edges of his mind. Reaching out to him, Aoba realized suddenly that something had changed between them in a way he couldn't explain, but the sense of excitement he received in reply was enough let him know his other self was there and aware. 

"I'm assuming you can hear and understand me, yes?" Noiz asked

_Yes!_

"That’s the same as the first one," Ren whispered. "Is he perhaps ... trying to communicate?

"Looks like it, although I don't have a fucking clue what he's trying to say."

 _I can hear you!!_

"Listen Aoba,” Noiz began, “you got your dumb ass into one hell of a situation. I am talking one hell of an incredibly, _seriously_ fucked-up situation. I've seen some fucked-up shit over the years, but this ... I don't even know how to begin to describe this."

"I am sorry, Noiz," Ren said. Aoba could picture his ears drooping and eyes downcast.

"Yeah, yeah," Noiz said in that brusque way he had. "Anyway, listen … in order for us to make any progress, we need to communicate and I've got an idea. I need you to say 'yes' for me ... just 'yes,' nothing else."

_Yes._

"Was that 'yes' ?"

 _ **Yes.**_

Noiz laughed suddenly. "See that?" There was the unmistakable sound of plastic tapping on glass, like Noiz was pointing out something on an old-time glass monitor with a pen. "I’ll bet you ten thousand yen that's the 'smartass' indicator. You can practically hear the tone in his voice, can't you..."

Aoba suspected Ren was nodding in agreement.

"You know, despite being a pain in my ass, this is a fucking _beautiful_ piece of technology." 

“Indeed,” Ren agreed. “We are indebted to you.”

"Damned right,” Noiz said. “Okay, Aoba … now that we've got 'yes' down, let's get 'no.' No backtalk, just 'no.' "

_No._

"Once more … with feeling?"

Aoba knew Noiz was grinning; he could hear it in his voice. If he had been able, he would have rolled his eyes. 

_**No.**_

"And there it is. We can now communicate," Noiz said in that arrogant way that had always grated on Aoba's nerves. Still, though ... if Noiz was the one who had taken care of Ren, he supposed he could put up with it. For a while.

"Aoba, are you all right?" Ren questioned softly.

_Yes_

"Are you getting any data other than audio?" This time, Noiz.

_Data? What the hell are you talking about?_

"Let’s stick with 'yes' or 'no,' since I've not yet figured out what any of the rest of this garbled junk you're giving me means."

"What Noiz means,” Ren interrupted, “is can you feel anything? Like ... before." And by the tone of Ren's voice, Aoba knew exactly what he meant by "before." 

Before the accident.

_No._

Aoba felt nothing. The only things he was experiencing were the sounds he was hearing and the faint presence of his other on the edges of his consciousness. At that thought, he felt his other stir in a combination of excitement and reassurance.

"Good ... that's another thing I did right. I'll add it to the bill," Noiz said blandly. There was bit of shuffling before he continued. "Look, here's the deal ... if you think you're ready to wake up, you can."

Aoba responded immediately.

 _Yes!_

"Yeah, well, listen before you agree to it. I can fire you up and bring you partially online right now, but you have got to keep your shit together. If you flip out and break yourself, that's going to be four weeks of my life down the drain. And I can't guarantee I can fix you, either." 

Noiz wasn't making a whole lot of sense, but if he was saying that Aoba could leave this strange purgatory ... if he could see Ren and Clear ... and Koujaku and Mizuki ... hell, even _Noiz_ , Aoba would do whatever it took. 

_Yes!_

"And I'm not taking care of Ren if you go _kaputt_ , either," Noiz continued. "I'll send him back to your airhead boyfriend on his own and god knows what the two of them would get up to without you there to keep them in check. They'd probably burn your house down. So you have to keep your shit together … for them, as much as yourself."

It was a strangely sentimental thing for Noiz to say.

"Aoba, you have to understand that things are very different," Ren said. "I am no longer in my original Allmate form and you are ..." His voice trailed off, as if he were having trouble coming up with the right words. "... you are vastly changed, Aoba. The experience may be quite overwhelming." 

Aoba heard what sounded like the rustle of fabric, very close to him. 

"But I'm here with you," Ren continued. “Please remember that.” 

"Aw…that’s sweet,” Noiz commented, whatever sentiment he might have been feeling disappeared and replaced by his typical sarcasm. “Listen up, idiot. When you wake up, you're gonna see a lot of equipment around. _Do not touch anything_. Especially not the cables." 

_Cables?_

"You're also probably going to be freaking out, but you have to try to be still. If you make any sudden moves, you could fuck everything up."

"If it becomes too much, Noiz can return you to this state."

 _\--no--_  
It wasn't as much a word as it was an impression from his other self. 

_No_  
Aoba added, giving both of them a voice.

"You know, he's stubborn enough that this is probably going to go off without a hitch," Noiz said in what seemed to be an attempt at reassurance.

“Aoba ... no matter what you see or feel, you are _you_. That has not changed," Ren said, his voice thick with emotion. "You are who you have always been ... and I am here with you.”

"Last chance ... are we doing this or not? Yes or no?"

_\--yes--_

_Yes._

"You got it."

And with that, Aoba came to himself, immediately and fully. A barrage of sensation flooded his body, coming from all directions in a truly overwhelming flood. He gasped at the sight of muted light making its way through his closed eyelids and he immediately registered the fact that he was laying down. Noiz had been right: the instinct to react, to bolt upright was almost overwhelming, but the firm pressure of soft skin against his -- a hand tightly grasping his own -- kept him grounded enough to remain still. 

"Aoba." 

_Ren_

Now that he had a sense of physicality, Aoba realized that Ren's voice was coming from above him and to his left. It took him a split second to realize that was where the person holding his hand would be and when he did, his eyes flew open.

There, sitting next to him was one of the new humanoid Allmates. Dark hair, hazel eyes, broad shoulders -- very similar, in fact, to Ren's online form -- and wearing an incredibly human look of concern on his face.

 _\--he said he wasn't in his old body anymore--_

"Ren?" Aoba asked, expecting his throat to be dry and rough from disuse. He was surprised when the word came out clear and strong ... and in a completely unfamiliar voice.

_\--he said we'd changed--_

Aoba looked past the Allmate to the equipment behind him. Noiz had been right, the room was absolutely packed with electronics -- hundreds of thousands of yen worth. And running from one enormous bank of computers there was indeed a large bunch of cables that ran past the Allmate, onto the bed, and ...

It hit him all at once, the realization of what had happened. Aoba raised his free hand to his head, knowing exactly what he would find. 

"Don't touch them, idiot." Noiz batted Aoba's hand away from where the cables were plugged in to his head. "Don't touch _anything_."

"Aoba, are you all right?" the Allmate asked in Ren's voice.

Aoba turned his head to look at Noiz, who was practically looming above him, the worry evident in his stance and expression. Truthfully, the worry could have been more for the equipment than for him, but it was surprisingly good to see nonetheless. 

After a long silence, Aoba said the first thing he could think of. 

"Why did Ren get to keep his voice ... and I didn't?"

Noiz stared at him for a second, then threw his head back in laughter that continued for longer than Aoba really thought it should have. 

"I don't know what the hell we were worried about," Noiz said finally, wiping the moisture that had gathered in his eyes. "He's too damned stupid to freak out." And with that, he turned around and went back to the terminal at the foot of the bed.

“Aoba…” 

He turned back to Ren, trying to ignore the strange, dragging feel the motion created in the cables attached to his head. Ren was smiling, the edges of his mouth turned up and his brow slightly creased. 

He was stunning.

"I am truly sorry about the loss of your voice," he said, still holding tightly to Aoba’s hand. "My voice was part of my original body's programming, so it was a natural part of the transfer. As a human, your body had no programming ... " Ren paused, seemingly at a loss.

"So we had to wing it." Noiz helpfully completed the thought. “With the exception of the memory transfer and personality protocols, you're a brand new man, Seragaki Aoba. Top-of-the-line, Allmate Companion Model R-23c -- 100% built and maintained by Toue Corporation." He paused a beat before adding, “Try to save the existential crisis until after we get you fully online.”

Aoba had guessed this -- guessed all of it -- but hearing it spoken out loud was still a shock.

He was like Clear now. 

No. 

More than Clear, he was like Ren. 

Ren, who had once been a part of him.  
Ren, who had spent decades with no memory of who he was.  
Ren, who had been his companion and friend, and who had _saved him from death._  
Ren, who was sitting next to him, whole and in human form.  
Ren, who loved as much as he was loved.

Ren, whom Aoba loved with all his being.

And if Ren was okay with this … with all of this … then Aoba would be too. He had to be.

"Thank you," he said abruptly, squeezing that unfamiliar hand, "for taking care of me"

Ren blinked once, then twice as a faint red tinged his cheeks. “I should say the same.”

“You’re the expert in all this … I’m going to have to rely on you, now.”

Ren paused, then leaned over to place his forehead against Aoba's, the first time he had ever initiated such contact. Aoba wondered if it felt as much like coming home to Ren as it did to him.

“The pleasure will most assuredly be mine,” Ren whispered. 

Aoba’s heart swelled as he placed his hand against the back of Ren's head, ruffling his hair gently. They remained like that for a long moment, reveling in the feel of being close like this for the first time, before a thought crossed Aoba’s mind. 

“Your hair …” 

Ren pulled back enough to look him in the eyes. “Is there something wrong?”

“It’s still _really_ fluffy…” He snickered at the look of horror that crossed Ren’s face. “Clear’s gonna have a field day.”


End file.
